Why Accepting Yourself can be Your Biggest Challenge

Hey everyone! I wanted to chat about some exciting things going on in my life and share how my mental and physical health journey is going. Some of you may know that I’ve had issues with anxiety and depression (which is why I like to blog about it!) as well as body image issues. All the fun stuff, right? HA! I’ve always tried to be open with others about these personal problems because I think they’re important to talk about. Sharing my journey is at a turning point though- I’ve realized that accepting myself opens a million doors!

The Comparison Game

I’ve spent years comparing myself to other women. I often wondered “why am I not as thin as she is?” or “why don’t I have the beautiful home she does?” All these questions left me drained and feeling unworthy. Let’s be real- how on Earth could asking these questions ever be fulfilling? They’re questions that are designed to tear down the person who is asking them. And I WILLINGLY asked myself these questions.

Comparing myself and my life’s journey to someone else’s is a recipe for depression. Clinical depression isn’t always caused by one particularly thing, sometimes its honestly just a chemical imbalance in your brain, however it can be exasperated and prolonged by upsetting situations or thoughts. I made my own depression much worse and last much longer by asking myself almost every waking moment of the day, why I wasn’t good enough. It literally made me sick.

Understanding My Relationship with Money

I had a revelation the other day thanks to something my counselor said. When I was complaining to her that I didn’t understand why I didn’t have the nice cars other women have, nice home, perfect body etc. she said to me “Your value systems are unique and aren’t the same as others.” My internal light bulb went on. She was so right.

I relish in the fact that I’ve padded my savings account enough that a car repair, an emergency trip home, or a surprise bill won’t make a dent in my budget. I do a happy dance whenever I get to deposit more money into my savings account because it means I’m meeting my financial goals!

Having it All

When I compare myself to other people that appear to “have it all,” I often forget that credit cards and loans are a thing and most American’s carry around a fair amount of debt. The other day I was walking out of Target (not surprising at all) and there was a girl about my age getting into a shiny new Mercedes. I thought to myself “how come I don’t have one too?” Then I thought, OH WAIT! I hate car payments! And if I bought a nice new car, then you better believe I’d have one! So I hopped into my 2007 Ford Edge (a hand-me-down from my future sister in law) and drove away!

My views on money management are simply different from other peoples’ and that’s totally fine. I buy most of my clothing on clearance. I only buy furniture on sale and have no problem doing a DIY if I need to. David and I’s rental home isn’t super fancy but only takes up 1/8th of our paycheck. That, in my opinion, is winning at life. My counselor also reminded me that millionaires can often be hard to spot because they live next door to you and drive old cars. MIND BLOWN. So moral of the story- material items don’t equal happiness, feeling secure and safe does.

Getting Comfortable in My Skin

“If you accept yourself the way you are now, all the things you want will fall into place” this is what my counselor said to me the other day at our appointment. I’ve struggled for the last few years with my body not cooperating with any of my weight loss tactics and it’s been so discouraging.

I didn’t have crazy expectations like having a six-pack of abs or a super lifted booty, but I wanted to see progress in my exercising and calorie-counting regiment. Surprise surprise- my body resists pretty much every attempt at losing weight because of my high stress levels and oddly enough, food intolerance.

Cortisol is the stress hormone and when your body makes too much of it, it can be harder to lose weight. I’m just about the most anxious person I know and something as simple as driving to a new place in Dallas can cause a wave of anxiety for me. Combine my anxiety to simple, everyday things with my anxiety over how my body looks and BOOM- cortisol levels are spiking all day, everyday! So the less I stress about how much weight I’ve lost and how I look, the more likely I am to lose weight. Accepting myself, being happy with the way I was built, and most importantly, being happy with my lifestyle, could actually lead to the results I’ve been pining for.

Surprising Food Allergies

Now let’s talk about that food allergy I mentioned earlier. For years I’ve dealt with constant bloating and stomach pain after eating just about anything. Looking in the mirror all I’d see is a girl with a big stomach in pain. Fun, let me tell ya! It killed myself esteem and made me even more anxious (and sometimes still does). I literally just went to the doctor and he told me I had a severe allergy to lactose. Yeah- my digestive system is afraid of cheese! Insert eye roll here. He told me to take lactose pills every morning and the bloating should subside. One day later, I feel way better!

Key Takeaways

Sorry, this is the longest post ever but I just have so much to say! Accepting myself, my lifestyle, and the way God made me is literally the key to finding happiness and self-worth. How crazy is that? Imagine if we all did that and how we’d feel and even treat others? The comparison game, depression, body image issues, and a million other problems we all have may literally just become things of the past. How great would that be? So I’m encouraging you to reflect internally on who you are, what makes you different, what your value systems are, and how you feel throughout the day. The answers may surprise you!

5 Steps to a Healthier You

life changing health tips

For the last few months, I’ve been super down on myself for many reasons. Some of them are silly and others are justified. We’ve all had those days where we sulk and want to give up, but for me those days turned into months. As a fashion blogger, I feel like it’s part of my job to create an illusion for people following me that I have it all together. News flash: I don’t. Not even close. But during the first week of the New Year, I decided to do something about how I was feeling inside and outside. I changed my habits and how I lived to become a healthier, happier me! I’m sharing with you the steps I took to change my lifestyle!

Health Benefits of Apple Cider Vinegar

When I was little, my grandmother swore by a few things for her health and apple cider vinegar was one of them. My boyfriend, David, and I have started drinking a tablespoon of it every day. The health benefits are amazing! It helps lower blood sugar, fight diabetes, and even aids in weight loss by making you feel full quicker. I was skeptical about the weight loss aspect, but I have to admit that I feel fuller faster than before!

Get in the Gym

I’ve also added 30 minutes of gym time to my week days. Last year I gained a few pounds and trust me when I say I complained about it all the time. In the last month, I’ve been working my butt off to lose that weight and get back in shape for the summer!

Take Your Vitamins

Whenever I scroll through my Instagram feed, there are so many pretty girls with long hair and gorgeous manicured nails. I started looking around for a vitamin that would promote hair and nail growth and health. I came across biotin and have implemented that into my daily vitamin pack.

Develop a Skin Care Routine

For better skin, I adapted an actual skin care routine! Before, I just washed my face at night to get off my makeup. Now, I use a great cleanser and toner (link to my favorite here) eye makeup remover (link here). Every few days I also do a mud mask to get rid of toxins and other gross stuff sitting on my skin. A brighter complexion makes your skin appear hydrated and cared for!

Think Happy Thoughts

Finally, for my emotional and spiritual health I’ve started doing two things: thinking positively and doing a daily devotional. Being a positive person has never ever been in my nature. My mom sometimes calls me “negative Nancy” because I tend to be a bit of a pessimist. Negative thoughts can really hurt your mental health though. With the help of David’s older sister, Marsha, I’ve been trying to adapt a more positive, happy outlook on life. She’s a really inspiring person to be around and nothing ever seems to get her down!

There are so many great things you can do for your health this year! I try not to overwhelm myself with too many changes because let’s be real, it’s hard to get into a habit and not break it. Becoming a better me is my goal for this year. There’s no reason you and I can’t be the people we want to be! It just takes some work and a lot of dedication! Leave me a comment with your goals for this year!

dallas fashion blogger

8 Simple Ways to Destress After Work

etsy pumpkin spice

Happy Thursday everyone! Only one more day until Friday, so start making your weekend plans! Friday night, I’m going to watch Hocus Pocus in one of the public parks here in Dallas. I’m bringing a cozy blanket, a picnic basket full of munchies, and of course a big pumpkin spice latte. Speaking of which, one of my favorite things to do after work to relax is sit on the couch with my favorite pumpkin spice latte mug and drink some coffee. Read on for a few of my favorite ways to relax after work!

relaxing ideas after work

Ways to Relax After Work

We all have our vices and things that calm us down when we’re stressed or just have had a long day. My days are filled with demands from my job and early mornings. Sometimes I don’t have time for anything other than a protein shake and a big cup of coffee. But when I get home I relax by doing something enjoyable. Here are a few easy ways to destress at home:

  • Color in a coloring book (Michael’s has some for under $5!)
  • Take a hot bath with fizzy bath bombs
  • Sip coffee or tea while spending time with your kitty or pup
  • Lift weights and do some cardio to burn off stress
  • Paint your nails a festive color for the season
  • Sit by a fire and read a book
  • Create a new board on Pinterest and pin a few items
  • Do some online shopping and buy yourself a little something

Your mental health is so important to the rest of your life! I’ll be totally honest and tell you that in addition to doing some of these things, I also from time to time talk with a psychologist to ease my anxieties. You wouldn’t think people would judge me for that, but you’d be surprised how people react when they find out I talk to a “shrink”. But in my opinion, it’s nothing to be embarrassed by! Sharing your ideas and feelings with another person that will tell you the truth is so beneficial. It’s truly the best stress reliever for me.

If none of these ideas tickle your fancy, a scientifically proven way to fight depression and anxiety is to smile and laugh. For whatever reason, it makes your entire body feel better. I won’t go into the science of it mostly because I’ll totally butcher it, but it works and we all need to smile more. If that’s all you get out of this post, then I’m happy with that!

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